It is a fact that after the holiday season ends there are more divorces and relationship breakdowns than at any other time of the year. What does this mean for you, are you investing enough time in your relationship that you can ride through a rough patch and come out a stronger couple the other side?
The New Year, a new start often come hand in hand, but why wait till the New Year to continue or break up a relationship? It is important that you understand how you feel about your partner and the relationship you have.
Divorce Is Common Place
We live in a society that accepts the bonds, which you build might not last a lifetime and that is fine as long as you feel that the relationship has run its course. However, many relationships aren’t given the time to develop and connect.
If your relationship is toxic, which is harmful to you and others around you, it is important that you consider the consequences of staying in a toxic relationship. It is not good for you, physical or mental abuse of a partner is not acceptable no matter who is doing the abusing.
If you are in a relationship, which is causing you or other family members harm, including children, then getting out is the best option and there are organizations that can help.
Investing Time In Relationships
There are reasons for getting married, for living together but the most important aspect of any relationship is building a base. You have to know a person, what they feel their thoughts and fears with which you can use to build a base to establish if this relationship is going to last long-term.
I have sat for hours with my husband talking through what I want out of life and what he wants so that we know where we are both coming from. We connect daily to discuss things and this connection is important, it has helped us through some tough times, but in the end, we are stronger together as a team.
It is not just about building relations with our partners, which is important but with our children too; they need time with parents to build the bond, which will see them through the tough times.
Life is not easy, you have to work at things, and this is difficult for many people. It is not about what others do or didn’t do for you, but what you can do for others. Teaching our children the qualities of life and how to build relationships that’s based on trust and understanding is important.
The world is becoming a very self-centred place, getting whatever you can. I sometimes wonder if this has anything to do with people not investing time in relationships, because they are just looking to get what they can and not thinking of what they can give back.
Counselling Can Help
You might think that counselling is for other people but you’ll be surprised the amount of help that attending a counselling session can do, the most important aspect of counselling is talking and this is often the most difficult aspect, too.
Being able to communicate is often misunderstood; it is not about talking but listening to what the other person has to say.
For me this is the hardest aspect of anything, I am a talker and that is not going to change, but I am trying to take the step back and let the other people around me talk and for me to listen. However, this is a quality that I am learning, it is not just about fighting and defending but accepting and growing as a person and living the life that you want to live and not necessarily the life you are living now.
If that means change, then think about what you want to change and how you can put the steps in place to change. Life is short and making the most of the time available to live the life that you want is important, but learning to invest time in those people around you could change your whole outlook on life.
Therefore, it is important to invest time in those people around us, not just in the relationships with loved ones, but all those people who form part of our lives.